0 – 40 in 40 years

before i was born, i was simply a thought, a dream

i was dreamed into life and dreamed up by a Creator

when i was born, i was new and every breath a first

at 1 i knew my world existed

at 2 i started to explore what ‘world’ means

on my 3rd birthday, my baby sister was born

at 4 we moved back to my town of birth

as a 5-year-old i played on the farm

at 6 i rode on a donkey cart with Jackson

my 7th year i started school

at 8 i realised that i like my own company more than that of my family

as a 9-year-old girl i started to experience my ability to use my body to excel in sport

after my 10th birthday i went to another school where i wanted to learn to play the piano, but my teacher told me she think i must stick to sport

3 months after i’ve turned 11 my dad decided to move to another province and i was MAD, because i had to leave my best friend behind…

at 12 i started to date a boy in my class who also turned out to be gay

when i was 13, i committed my life to Jesus and took it very serious to be a committed christian

at 14 i started to realise i am different and not similar to other girls my age – ‘tomboy’ sounds correct to how i perceived myself

my 15th year was a highlight of personal achievements on all levels of my life

at 16 i went to a school hostel and had my first girlfriend experience

17 was a weird year, as i’ve actually tried to kiss a boy… oh, it did not work…

at 18 i’ve achieved many commendable goals

as a 19-year-old young adult i’ve joined the army and know that this was most definitely the turning point year of my life for my own better and good!

at 20 i started to study

my 21 birthday party was a disaster…

at 22 i believed that i could change the world with my new profession and ended a 3 year relationship with my 2nd girlfriend

at 23 i started to work and within 3 months buried a 6-year-old boy who died; and was supposed to marry my boyfriend (we never kissed…), but ended the engagement before it really started

when i turned 24 i decided to not be in any relationship again

25 was a great year as i realised that new chances do exist after a terrible burnout

at 26 i decided to make drastic changes to my career – but did not really succeeded

27 was kind of a great year, as i challenged myself to new beginnings

at 28 i re-committed myself to my dreams and enjoyed what i was doing

i floated through my 29th year and longed to be 30-something…

my 30th birthday was extremely profound – i set goals for myself of things i’ve wanted to do before 30 and i did it!

at 31 i was hard-working, responsible and had a good job (but not good paying)

at 32 i broke my own promise to myself not to get romantically involved with another person again – but i did…

at 33 i was so in love i did not even mind to be secretly involved with my girlfriend – it was complicated…

at 34 i ventured into a private business (with my girlfriend) and worked very hard

when i was 35 we moved to cape town and started a very committed relationship – for the long hall

only at age 36 i came out to my family and friends as being gay and my girlfriend asked me to marry her – i accepted

at age 37 i got married…

in my 38th year, i realised i am happily married, settled comfortably, am a home owner and on my professional peak

my 39′th year of existence was the most challenging year of my life!!!…

i will turn 40 in less than 2 weeks time….

life, therefore is a journey which started long before birth happens, with a thought, a dream, a life…

and it is my choice how i will use every opportunity it brings to me and not allow anything out of my control to change the essence of who i am…
i am alive!!